Explore All Jokes

“Four engineers get into a car. The car won't start.
The Mechanical engineer says "It's a broken starter".
The Electrical…”

“You see, mountains aren't just funny.”

“Why did Santa's helper see the doctor?”

“What's the object-oriented way to become wealthy?”

“A neutron walks into a bar and asks for a price on a drink.
The barkeeper says: "For you... no charge!"”

“A Roman walks into a bar and raises 2 fingers and says to the bartender...”

“What's the difference between a hot potato and a flying pig?”

“What do you call a cow with no legs?”

“I'm not saying my son is ugly...”

“How did Harry Potter get down the hill?”

“Two peanuts were walking.”

“Judge: "I sentence you to the maximum punishment..."
Me (thinking): "Please be death, please be death..."
Judge: "Learn…”

“What is the best prefix for global variables?”

“My wife is really mad at the fact that I have no sense of direction.
So I packed up my stuff and right.”

“I can't believe I got fired from the calendar factory.”

“My wife and I have reached the difficult decision that we do not want children.
If anybody does, please just send me your contact…”

“Why shouldn't you visit an expensive wig shop?”

“What do elves post on Social Media?”

“UDP is better in the COVID era since it avoids unnecessary handshakes.”

“What does the MacBook have in common with Donald Trump?

I would tell you....
But I don't compare apples to oranges.”

“I used to love to tell dad jokes.”

“Thank you student loans for getting me through college.”

“A perfectionist walked into a bar... apparently, the bar was not set high enough.”

“I have these weird muscle spasms in my gluteus maximus.
I figured out from my doctor that everything was alright:
He said…”